Fear is a natural part of life. It happens whenever we are threatened or feel threatened. Threats can come in many forms - a snake on the ground in front of you, or being face-to-face with an angry person. When we encounter them, we have that indescribable feeling in the pit of our stomachs. Normally I would consider myself fairly fearless.
Spiders are one of the critters that will raise my hackles no matter what kind of spider it is, or how big or small it is. Mostly because I’m not educated on species of spiders, therefore I have no idea if it’s harmless, or a potential threat. So as far as I’m concerned, they’re all a threat. Well, except Daddy Longlegs. Those are cool. Probably because I know they’re not a threat.
Snakes don’t bother me too much, unless I’m in an area that is rife with poisonous ones. Then I’ll walk around on constant high alert.
I think the most significant fear I had to work through was during my marriage to my abusive ex. He successfully instilled some major fear in me, but I was lucky to have had a great supporting group of friends that enabled me to escape with my life. Every so often, even all these years later, if I see someone who resembles my ex, I’ll feel that fear rise up until my brain sorts out that it really isn’t my ex. So I guess sometimes I walk around on high alert against that poisonous snake as well.
Another fear is being in unfamiliar surroundings with a large group of people. I tend to be more on the shy side, so I'll be quiet until I become familiar with my surroundings or the people around me. Then I have the fear that I'll say something dorky or talk too much. I guess I better hurry up and get over that fear as I plan on attending BlogHer '10 later this year.
But my biggest fear?
Maureen over at Island Roar said it best in her Spin post about fear. My biggest fear only surfaced after the miraculous birth of Princess Nagger. The fear that I will die an early untimely death and leave her motherless. Maureen outlined the exact thought process that goes through my head, too.
That fear is of course exacerbated by the fact that Hovering Hubby wouldn’t know the first thing about how to take care of Princess Nagger, since he works hard to support our household and rarely has the opportunity to be ‘in charge’ of the day-to-day basic stuff. He’d be a fish out of water if I weren’t around to take care of that ‘stuff’. And he’d certainly have his hands full.
I have every intention of living a long, full life. If nothing else so I can be around when Princess Nagger gets married and has kids of her own. I would love to watch her be a mother. Especially if she has kids just like her.
This Fearful Spin Cycle was brought to you in part by Jen, one of the bravest women I know and Sprite's Keeper. Head on over and check out the other spinners - find out who shares the same fears you may have. It's nice to know we're not alone!